


Poor Napkin

by Starbuck09256



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Fluff, IVF, MSR, donor story, season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:42:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27689113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starbuck09256/pseuds/Starbuck09256
Summary: how did she ask Mulder to be her donor?
Relationships: Fox Mulder/Dana Scully
Kudos: 18





	Poor Napkin

What are you doing to that poor napkin?

She’s wringing it between her two hands twisting and turning it over and over. She is so nervous she looks acrossed at him with his burger and fries and the piece of apple pie she encouraged him to get. Her slice of pecan with ice cream melting on the side. She didn’t even bother with the Cobb salad she ordered how could she? Right now it comes down to a question. A question of faith of loyalty. Of the unrelenting and overbearing feeling of doubt that has creeped into her mind taking root faster and stronger than any weed.

She puts down the napkin muttering a fast “sorry” he’s looking at her with that intense gaze that says he isn’t buying it but after years of car rides lineups quarantines he knows that something big is occupying her mind like a cancer. While she tries to free herself from its clutches he waits because it’s usually something to do with him. It also usually foreboding and encompassing of something tragic and painful where a small piece of his soul dies and he never quite captures it back. He slides out of his side on the vinyl plastic booth it’s red interior a small prism into the rest of the decorated diner she has brought him too. Where young couples might share a milkshake or your pop brings you in for ice cream. Where the waitress wears those little paper hats and a white apron with a distinctive drawl of “what can I get ya hun?”

He moves to slide next to her and she moves quickly close to the window with the cheap plastic blinds looking out to a dreary afternoon drizzle. She looks out through the dusty slats to people with raincoats and umbrellas to dogs with coats and she can’t help but wonder how easy life is when you get to buy your dog a coat.

“Scully you want to ask me something and it’s been bothering you all damn day and now you bring me to my favorite little diner and order me apple pie, so how bad are we talking?” Her chin falls down as she bites her lip in terror.

A couple runs across the street with their daughter trudging along in ladybug boots trying to splash in all the puddles.

“I want a baby” she breathes out to the rain like a prayer and a sigh a wish and a whisper.

Mulder licks his lips waiting for a real question not a declaration of something he believes to be impossible. He shakes his head in sadness. He’s not sure where this is going. He knows she’s been craving this a small piece of light to fight the walking nightmare she lives in everyday. He waits you can’t push her she will close up faster than a razor clam and pretend to be fine and it might be months before she shows you a sliver of her true self.

“I had an appointment yesterday with the ovum you gave me” he nods softly ashamed that he kept something so personal from her.

“They said it would be a long shot but if I started right away with a donor it might be possible.”

The end is said so soft and in such a rush he barely registers what she is telling him as she picks up the napkin again and rings the life out of it.

“Scully that’s that’s good news right? Although I have a feeling that most of those anonymous donor types might look like Frohike” he says with a chuckle.

She smiles a soft chuckle “at least 50%” she says.

She is too kind to the male population surly it’s more like 70. He laughs too but its mirthless if this works she will move on to accomplish something so much greater than both of them. She would be a wonderful mother not just because of her general nature but because she is fully aware of the sacrifice it would mean.

“What does this mean for us?” He asks his own fear caressing his skin like a soft blanket.

“I was hoping to not use an anonymous donor. I was praying it could be you.” He is taken back.

Her love and loyalty notwithstanding this was not what he expected.

“Me..” his own voice caught with the implications.

“You said it yourself the Mulder family passes genetic muster, corrective lens the only real issue.” she rushes.

He licks his lips biting on the bottom for the words to convey his love without breaking her heart. Can he be the one to grant this wish even if it would take away his only meaning for existence? How selfish is he to say no to her when he is the reason she has to even ask someone in the first place.

“Mulder you are compassionate, brilliant, adventurous and whimsical. I admire you so much and I truly would love to have a child with all those same qualities.”

She’s back to the napkin but looking at him.

“It’s so much to ask god I know it is.. but before you decide could you just take a few days before I subject myself to the frohikes of the world? Please?”

“I would need to think about it, it would change a… lot.”

“I know” her voice already far away as she watches another child dancing in the rain with bright yellow boots and big toothy smile. She wipes her eyes quickly.

He reaches across to her hand taking the napkin out of her hand. “Dana…are you sure?” Her eyes flash up to his the blue intensity almost blinding. She licks her lips.

“As sure as you have ever been.” she whispers softly.

He sits back looking at his apple pie. He reaches over again taking her hand and the poor little napkin. “No matter what is decided I support you, always” he says.

She smiles softly her head already turning over the words into the worse situation, the worst outcome. She might never get her miracle baby and she might even lose the man she yearns for in the process. Before she can dwell on that though Mulder slides next to her in the booth picks up her hand and kisses. “Thank you for asking me, I do want to think about it ok?”

“Ok” she says staring at their hands together the soft feel of his fingers and the poor little napkin in her hand.


End file.
